Tag Archives: self-awareness

Los Des Enmascarados.

mask1Apuesto que al igual que yo, tu también has sido culpable de decir o pensar “no voy al gimnasio porque no tengo tiempo…”, “me alimento de comida rápida porque no tengo tiempo para ir al mercado y menos para cocinar en casa…”, y “no tomo un curso ya que no tengo tiempo para estudiar…”

No estoy buscando ser aguafiestas.  Más bien busco retar la creencia común y acabar con la cantaleta “…no tengo tiempo…” – y así ayudar a la gran mayoría de personas a alcanzar sus metas. 

Entonces, si sigues ahí, estando de acuerdo con aquellas personas que le echan la culpa de su status quo a la falta tiempo, te invito a sacar cuentas:

  • ¿Horas en tu semana? 148
  • ¿Horas por semana que el promedio de las personas pasan viendo televisión? 21 a 35 (mas de un día)
  • ¿Horas por semana que el promedio de las personas pasa surfiando el Internet? 7 a 14
  • ¿Horas por semana que le promedio de las personas pasa chismoseando con amigos, ya sea por teléfono, SMS o correo electrónico? Ese calculo se lo dejo a tu conciencia.
  • ¿Horas por semana que el promedio de las personas pasa durmiendo los fines de semana? También se lo dejo a tu conciencia.
  • ¿Horas en la semana de Bill Gates, Madre Teresa y Hillary Clinton? 148

Sospecho que ya entendiste que no es por falta de tiempo que la gran mayoría de las personas no alcanza sus metas.  Y entonces ¿por que es que muchos no hacen “esas” cosas clave, que los llevaría a alcanzar sus metas? 

(Música de suspenso por favor…)

Miedo – disfrazado de falta de tiempo.

Así es.  El miedo viene en muchos colores y sabores.  De uno ya te hable en un post pasado – la rabia.  Otro es un sentimiento de que no hay suficiente tiempo para alcanzar a hacer todo aquello que queremos.

Seguro que te estas preguntando ¿y a que, sienten miedo aquellos que se refugian detrás de la falta de tiempo?

Eso depende de cada persona.  Unos temen fracasar, y no alcanzar sus metas. Otros temen ser objeto de burla. Otros temen ser objeto de crítica.  Otros temen sobresalir tanto que no pertenecen al grupo de mediocres que los rodea. 

En fin, la lista de razones por las cuales sentimos miedo es bien extensa. Y detallarla no solucionaría nada.  Mas bien la próxima vez que pienses que es por falta de tiempo que no estas haciendo algo que sabes que te pondría más cerca de tus metas, pausa.  Pregúntate a que le temes. Al responder, atrévete a ser brutalmente honesta.  Así le quitaras el disfraz a tu miedo.  Y veras como aparecerá, como por arte de magia, el tiempo que pensaste no tener.

 

Gracias Carnaval de Venecia por la foto tan adecuada.

¡Suelta el freno de mano!

Snow_SkiEs un hecho – la indecisión es como el oxigeno. En el trabajo y en nuestra vidas en general, esta en todas partes. Mas que todo porque, tal cual como la hilera de cereales en el supermercado, las opciones simplemente abundan.

Entonces ¿que debemos hacer para no ahogarnos en un mar de opciones – y aprender a tomar decisiones rápidas que pasen la prueba del tiempo? 

  1. Suelta el freno de mano.  Cuando de decisiones se trata – evita a todo costo el parálisis – por sobre análisis.  No te engañes. No tomar una decisión, también es una decisión. Quizás una de las peores.
  2. Las decisiones perfectas son un producto de la imaginación de los indecisos.  En la realidad no existen.  Todo trae un sacrificio.  Identifica y analiza que estas ganando y perdiendo a cambio de tu decisión – y decide cual decisión es de mayor beneficio.
  3. Mírala a los ojos. Reconocer que eres indecisa es el primer paso a ganar la batalla.  Aquí la autocrítica constructiva tiene su lugar.  Negar que algo podría estar mejor, te privara de la oportunidad para mejorar.
  4. Deja marinar. Tal como un buen encurtido necesita tiempo para estar listo – las buenas decisiones toman tiempo para producir resultados.  Confía en el proceso. Abrir el frasco antes de tiempo – es decir retroceder o cambiar de rumbo antes de tiempo – te hará dudar que tomaste la decisión correcta.
  5. Échale cabeza y corazón. Las decisiones que pasan el visto bueno de tu razón y de tus emociones tienen más chance de ser sostenibles. Piensa en la última decisión que tomaste que se sintió bien.  ¿Te acuerdas que resultados produjo?
  6. A las tentaciones – búscales reemplazo.  Posiblemente se presentaran tentaciones en tu camino – que te harán dudar de la posición que escogiste.  Que nublaran tu norte. Cuando esto pase, lee el punto 2.
  7. 8 horas de sueño son mágicas.  No te dejes apresurar por tus colegas – ni tu jefe.  Cuando tengas que tomar una decisión de gran impacto, pide al menos un día para pensarlo.  Aprovecha que mientras duermes tu cerebro esta trabajando en una respuesta – funciona como por arte de magia.

Entonces – ¿que estas esperando para soltar el freno de mano – y alcanzar tus metas?

Namaste*

IMG_2129Lo sé – la Yoga esta de moda.  Y siendo que soy alérgica a las modas (me dan sarpullido…) me sorprende que llevo mas de 7 años practicándola.

Esta mañana, frustrada y encalambrada en mitad de una Asana (palabra en Sánscrito – que significa posición), dejé mi mente correr.  Buscando escapar la tortura auto impuesta, empecé a buscar explicaciones para mi perseverancia con una practica que gran parte del tiempo me produce dolor, rabia y frustración. 

Siendo que empecé a ver la luz – a pesar de tener la cabeza boca abajo en medio de una parada de manos – aquí comparto algunas de las enseñanzas que he logrado transferir del estudio a la oficina – y quizás te ahorre calambres y frustración:

  1. Celebración en privado.  Vivimos en un mundo de junkies de atención, donde la gran mayoría de las personas buscan el reconocimiento para valorar sus logros.  Las masas piensan que si no han aparecido desnudos en la portada de SOHO o en CityTV, no han logrado nada en sus vidas.  Diferente a muchas actividades, en Yoga no hay posibilidad de ganar o ser reconocido (o de aparecer en revistas y televisión).  Uno es el único que sabe que se alcanza dentro del estudio.  De igual manera, en el mundo del trabajo el reconocimiento no es garantizado.  Entre mas temprano en tu carrera ajustes tus expectativas a esta realidad, mas fácil será.  La realidad es que habrá ocasiones que tendrás  un jefe que celebrara tus triunfos – al igual que habrá ocasiones cuando tu jefe se robara tus triunfos.  Por eso es importante que aprendas a celebrar tus propios logros – y a no depender de los demás para valorarte. 
  2. Competir es anti Yoga.  Yoga se practica para mejorar la práctica personal – no para ganarle a los demás.  Afuera del estudio, tampoco existen las carreras.  La realidad es que hay veces estamos delante de otros, y hay veces estamos atrás.  La única competencia que es importante es contra uno mismo – y esta dura toda la vida.
  3. Practica de por vida.  Algo fundamental de la Yoga es que nunca, no importa a que nivel se esta, se hace Yoga.  Por toda la vida, Yoga se practica – ya que jamás se para de aprender.  En el mundo del trabajo esto lo saben los exitosos.  Te imaginas que un cirujano – que te va a operar – se graduó hace 10 años y no ha vuelto a abrir un libro?
  4. Finísima atención al detalle.  Entre mas conozcas los detalles mas pequeños de tu cuerpo – el ritmo de tu respiración, tus tendones, ligamentos y músculos – mas fácil será acomodar tu cuerpo a las posiciones.  En la oficina es la fina atención al detalle – momento a momento – lo que te lleva a producir los mejores resultados.  Es al nivel de los detalles donde se alcanza la excelencia.
  5. ¡Aja!  A pesar de que la Yoga toma dedicación, enfoque y disciplina, cuando menos lo esperamos el cuerpo simplemente fluye – sin mucho esfuerzo.  Lo mismo pasa en el trabajo. Hay momentos y días que las cosas van tal cual como esperamos.  Así que déjate sorprender.
  6. Confía en el proceso.  Gran parte de entrar en las Asanas es aprender como dejar fluir la energía suavemente por el cuerpo – con entrega y confianza.  Además, el proceso de aprendizaje en Yoga es lento – pero seguro.  Es por eso que la confianza es fundamental en Yoga.  De igual manera, hacer bien tu trabajo – con entrega y compromiso – día tras día te dará resultados. Confía que es así.

Ahora si – respira profundo, profundo – y prepárate para entregar la mejor versión de ti a este nuevo día.

Namaste. 

 

*Con esa palabra cierro mi práctica de Yoga.  Quiere decir en Sánscrito – bajo mi cabeza ante ti.

You gotta trust…

trust 2Trust – an over-used term, I know. 

That’s why the kind of trust I write about is not the one gurus and career coaches the world over suggest we build with our clients, colleagues and bosses. 

Instead, the kind of trust that’s under the glass here is self-trust.  Simply put, it is what you need to feel towards yourself to thrive in the world of work.  It’s that feeling when you make a decision, that it’s done and over with – no to-ing and fro-ing.  It’s done, finito.

Reaching that point is not easy – and for most doesn’t happen over night.  Admitedly, getting to the point where you make a decision and you don’t look back, is a challenge for most.  Yet the buck does not stop there.  That point is not an end in itself.  It is the process of reaching it that matters the most.

Why?

Because building self-trust is a process that requires self-awareness, simplification and cleansing – to name a few.  To begin with, it’s a matter of losing each and every layer that you have thrust upon yourself – in order to fend against the world.  Because there, beneath all your inhibitions, prejuidices, fears – lies your pure essence. You – unadulterated.  You – organic, grown locally and hand-picked. 

And that what you’re really made of – sans additives – is where your true wisdom lies. 

This is no airy-fairy statement.  My friend, it is how nature works.  The closer you come to your true essence, the more access you will have to your inner wisdom. Let me remind you that that wisdom has taken at the very least 3.2 million years to evolve.  It has been passed down to you, generation after generation since Lucy’s time – or maybe earlier.

And to think that this is effortless wisdom – you got the gift simply because you’re human.  Your dog didn’t get it – and forget about your pet fish.  Neither of them got the gift.  You lucky person – you!

You can relax because you don’t need to stand in line to claim your gift. Rather it’s a matter of taking a few deliberate measures and actions in your daily life. Here are the main ones:

  1. Take risks – and as important, learn from the outcomes.  Good or bad, everything leaves behind lessons for you to grow and learn.  It’s those lessons that you put under your belt that will increase your SELFtrust.
  2. Tune in to your feelings – situations either feel right or they feel wrong to your body.  Just as a kiss feels nice to your lips and hot water burns your skin, certain experiences feel right to your body – and others feels wrong.  Some things make you feel excited, others make you feel like you have a rock in your shoe.   Those feelings give you clues about your true essence.  And once you learn to feel your true essence, you have the opportunity (and choice) to honor it.  And that is one of the most powerful ways to build SELFtrust. 
  3. Pick the pattern – if you pay close attention, you follow a unique modus operandi.  Simply put, only you have your way of doing things.  And your way follows a certain pattern – or lets call it a theme.  Knowing what that is, gives you the choice to keep what’s working and to change what’s not.  Having that choice builds SELFtrust.  That said, do you know how and why you do things?  In other words, do you know what drives your choices and what stops you from taking action?  Start by asking yourself: What excites you? What are you drawn to? What scares you?  Can you pick the common denominator(s) in your choices?
  4. Decide – yes, it’s crunch time.  The most sustainable decisions, I’ve found, are the ones that I’ve made with both my head and my heart.   Even so, you need to take a stance – and to trust that decisions are neither right or wrong. They simply yield desirable or undesirable outcomes.

At the end of the day, whether you win or lose, come out on top or below, every outcome is part of your experience.  It makes part of your life’s story.    Besides, the race is long – and it’s only against yourself.

Now go on – and trust yourself.

 

Not sure what to think of the picture? Me neither – but thank you.

Safa el Blablablá

BlahBlahBlah(Post inspirado por la rima: “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”) 

Desde hace un tiempo llevo molestándome cuando escucho a personas hablar usando términos negativos.  Me molesto tanto que en ocasiones he tenido el coraje de decirlo – en la forma más amigable posible. (o eso espero…)

Una de las frases mas comunes que escucho es “me muero por verte!”  Claro que se lo que quieren decir.  Aun así, me pregunto ¿porque la tendencia a usar términos tan negativos como lo son “me muero”, “muerta del cansancio” y “casi lo mato”?

Me pregunto ¿si será más constructivo describir con mas exactitud lo que estas sintiendo?  Por ejemplo, en el caso de estar feliz de ver a una persona (“matada de la dicha por verte”), que tal si lo dices tal cual: “estoy feliz de verte.”   Si sientes la necesidad de ser mas expresiva, que tal si dices algo como: “saber que te voy a ver me a puesto una sonrisa de lado a lado.” 

¿Te das cuenta como lo que estas sintiendo en realidad es lejos de la muerte – es mas bien vida?

¿Y porque tanta pedantería con el uso de las palabras? 

Para responderte, pon atención a como te sientes – tanto en tu mente como en tu cuerpo – cuando lees: ”Estoy muerta de la dicha!”  Y ahora pon atención en como te sientes – tanto en tu mente como en tu cuerpo – cuando lees: “Estoy tan tan feliz. que dicha!” 

Si hiciste bien el ejercicio, seguro te diste cuenta que la primera frase, aunque tiene una connotación positiva, te hace sentir cerrada – sin fluidez.  La segunda frase te ha debido hacer sentir abierta, entregada a la felicidad. De pronto hasta con ganas de pegar brinquitos. 

Entonces si día a día armas tus frases con palabras que te hacen sentir cerrada, pues terminaras cerrándote a la vida, e importantemente a las infinitas posibilidades que te ofrece.  Si en vez te enfocas, y armas tus frases con palabras que te hacen sentir abierta y con energia, en poco tiempo empezaras a sentir la abundancia de la vida.

Y si crees que esto es muy alternativo – y hasta apesta a Palo Santo – te invito a que pases aunque sea un día escogiendo palabras abiertas y más exactas.  Después decide si te quedas con las tuyas.

Aquí te doy unas pistas – sacadas de mi propia atención al detalle.  Mi intención es darte el regalo de las palabras. Con tu sola atención lograras cambiar las palabras que usas – y como consecuencia mejorar tu vida.  Al evitar usar términos negativos y buscar términos positivos, crearas bienestar.  Te doy mi palabra.

Ahora si, aquí va:

Safa: “Me muero de la dicha, emoción, felicidad etc…”

Quédate con: “Que dicha, emoción, felicidad…”

Safa: “Es un riesgo – por lo tanto no lo tomaré.”

Quédate con: “Es una oportunidad que vale la pena aprovechar.”  El riesgo más grande es no arriesgarse. Si no me crees, piensa en cuantas oportunidades pierdes cada vez que te quedas paralizada – sin arriesgar.

Safa: “Estoy muerta del cansancio.” ¿Muerta?  Lo más probable es que le sacaste el jugo a tu día y simplemente necesitas recargar tus pilas.  Así que…

Quédate con: “Trabajé duro hoy.  Estoy bastante cansada.  Se que voy a dormir muy bien.”

Safa: “Lo voy a matar.”  Usé una frase parecida para expresarme con colegas australianos, y note sus expresiones de sorpresa y susto.  Y si has tenido la oportunidad de convivir con personas de otras culturas, es posible que tu también te has dado cuenta que chistear acerca de matar a alguien no se usa – no es un chiste. Punto.

Quédate con: “Esa persona me saca de quicio.” O “que paciencia la que necesito para lidiar con ella.” 

Safa: “Brutalmente honesta.”

Quédate con: “Vitalmente honesta.” En realidad, al ponerle luz a las situaciones en tu vida, por medio de la honestidad, estas creando bienestar.  Así que el término ‘vitalmente’ es más acertado que ‘brutalmente’.

Safa: “Que nunca falte!”

Quédate con: “Que siempre sobre!”  Suelo decir esto cuando hago un brindis – o doy gracias por algo en mi vida.  En realidad lo que buscamos es abundancia, verdad?

Safa: “Tengo un problema.”

Quédate con: “Tengo un reto.”  Los problemas tienden a achicopalarnos. Siendo así nos roban la energía creativa.  En cambio los retos nos energizan ya que podemos asumirlos. 

Ahora si ¿ves como las palabras tienen el poder de cambiar tu perspectiva – y por asociación tus sentimientos y nivel de energía para tomar acción?  Entonces ¡safa el blablablá!

Drop it!

Drop: Problems – they will squash you.

Keep: Challenges – you will rise to meet them.

Drop: Excuses – they will drag you down.

Keep: Reasons – they will energize you.

 

Drop: Sacrifices – they will make your decisions seem painful.

Keep: Trade-ups – it’s what you gain when you choose long-term benefits over instant gratification.

 Need to drop anything else?  How about self-sabotage?

A New Kind of Hero for a New Kind of World, Hero #5


(This post is part of a pact I made. Click 
here for the full story.)

Move over, Jana has arrived. 

In a 5 feet 5 inches frame, and just over twenty years, this woman has already managed to pack what would take most several lifetimes to accomplish. 

For starters, Jana is more than half way through completing a self-funded medical degree (sans financial aid).  Already she has co-authored a research paper with one of the world’s top neurosurgeons (Dr. Charles Teo). She’s the VP of an executive board of a medical student organization. And she tutors other medical students.

She’s also one of the world’s youngest Bikram Yoga teachers.  And has taught yoga across Australia and around the world.

On the side, Jana plays and writes music and is currently working on a record and training for a marathon.

In her words, her career Nirvana is: ”becoming a surgeon as well as working to change our global healthcare systems.  I want to see medical care become more about education and prevention than drugs and treatment. This is where yoga comes in…”

Jana embodies a hybrid existence.  If you ever meet her, you’d agree that she comes across as ambitious and determined, yet at the same time she’s free-spirited and peaceful.  And if you look close enough, you’ll soon realize that inside her a left and a right brain co-exist in harmony. Like most left-brained doctors, Jana’s rational and factual. Whenever I’ve practiced yoga with her, she has explained, with clinical details, the medical benefits of every pose, and has been very quick to point out when someone’s pose is out of alignment.  Yet, unlike a doctor, she’ll admit that some things have happened in her life by pure chance – without any scientific explanation. Like Bikram Yoga.

She wrote to me: “I met Bikram Choudhury, (the founder of Bikram Yoga) …It was a chance meeting. He looked at me from across the dinner table, called me over and said: ‘You’ll become a yoga teacher. I know more about your life than you do and I can see your life’s path…’”

“A week later I deferred my (medical) degree, found people to take over my apartment…sat my final exams for the session, got my vaccinations and medical health all checked, and left for (Los Angeles) with $1000 in my bank (account) to study to become the youngest Bikram Yoga Teacher to date at that time.”

She goes on to say: “It wasn’t a choice. It was a path. Yogis say that everything has a ‘dharma’.  (The) wind’s dharma is to blow, fire’s dharma is to burn and humans’ dharma is “love, truth and sacrifice”. When you’re living your dharma they say all falls into place and so I think at that time and ever since, things just falling into place means that I’m on the right track, living my dharma, so to speak.”

Note to self: In a new world, unrules are the new rules of success.

More than a schedule, a day in the life of Jana sounds like a rap song where the rapper is left breathless:

“I wake at 5 most days, meditate, teach yoga, do a yoga class, go to clinic which is where I’m a student doctor, leave and teach another yoga class, then go home to study medical and yoga topics and sleep at 12am, get up and do it all again.”

She ends her line of thinking with: “There is a lot to do! I don’t watch television and I don’t think I could tell you the last time I felt like I was ‘wasting time’… Life is efficient…”

Note to self: There is no such thing as an unimportant day.

And how does she manage to lead such an efficient life?

As driven as Jana is, she lives by one mantra – and one mantra alone:

“I know the relative importance of all parts of life and know my health, mental and physical, is number one.”

As a true yogi, she wrote to me: “No matter what path you’re on – for me becoming a doctor – if you don’t have your own health, you have nothing. Like Bikram says: ‘The most important thing in your life is you  – not what you do or what or what you know or what you study or who you love – because without you, there is no your life.’ So having a complimentary practice like yoga, exercise, meditation, should be something you make time for everyday… we should praise, maintain and appreciate our health.”

And sounding like a doctor who has just finished writing a prescription, she explains: “I have so much information about how yoga and meditation lower blood pressure and benefit every system of the body. Since I started (practicing) yoga I have barely had a cold, I sleep less and feel better, I crave better foods and I feel incredible. I want everyone to have this accessible to them before they reach for medications and…fast food. It would save our healthcare system billions if people learned how to balance their lives and their health… not to mention the life years it would save.”

From what she wrote to me, it’s clear that she practices what she preaches:

“Every day that I got home from study, I would think: ‘I’m learning about health, but I have no time or outlet to be truly healthy myself. What am I doing? Even though I am learning. I’m getting fatter and unhealthier and more tired everyday.’ Then I found Bikram Yoga. It gave me the health and energy to study health at university. It was the perfect counterpart that kept me sane in an intellectual world where it is easy to go mad. There were so many times before I found yoga that my medical exams would push me nearly to the edge of a nervous breakdown; often tears and really catastrophic thinking patterns. But now I breeze through with the knowledge of how to be efficient and how to be calm and equanimous.”

Note to self: More than anything else, respect your health.  You’ll last longer. 

In spite of her achievements, Jana is far from perfect.

As she admitted in an email: “I stumbled over a few things on the way to being accepted into medical school. I missed the date of application for medical school when I was in my final year of high school because I had moved out of home, had a turbulent time and was not given guidance on the matter!”

This mishap landed her in a medical science degree for two years before she could transfer to the Bachelor’s of Medicine program. 

Note to self:  So what if at first you don’t get what you want? If you try hard enough, some day you’ll get it.  How badly you want something will determine how hard you work towards it.

True to her self-awareness, she leaves us all with:

“I would say that this multidisciplinary approach has meant I can relate to a lot of people and that I feel very satisfied but I also often feel overworked and like I am never giving enough to each part of my life individually! The solution…the balance…I’m still working on that.”

Why on Earth are you here?

Even during an economic downturn, finding meaning in our lives is not a privilege reserved only for a select few – it’s everyone’s responsibility.

At the risk of sounding too preachy, I’ll borrow some insight from Jewish wisdom that says: ”The day that you were born was the day that G-d decided that the world could no longer live without you.”

That means two things:

First, that we all matter to this world. 

Second, that it is up to each one of us to find out exactly why we were put on Earth – so that we can fulfill our unique purpose. (I can assure you that while paying bills is part of life’s package – it is not anyone’s main reason for being)

Here I share with you the process that helped me uncover what I’ve come to call my reason for being.

To get your mental juices flowing, take time to imagine what you would do with your life if you did not have any bills to pay.  If it helps your imagination, take some time to relax before you answer this question.   Close you eyes if it helps you relax.  Take a few deep breaths.  Let it all go.  Once your mind is still, imagine that it’s your 80th birthday (or 100th depending on your gene pool).  What would you like your friends and family to say about your achievements and your contributions?  What about your adventures?

Now consider the following three dimensions of your work life:

  1. Distinguishing skill: This is something that not only you are able to do well, but you are well known for at work.  Think about the tasks or projects for which you are the ‘go to person’.  For example, among my friends, I’m the go-to-person for career advice.  It’s been that way for several years even before I decided to write a book on the subject.
  2. Predominant interest:  It’s possible that you have many interests.  Even so, pay close attention – observe yourself.  What one interest do you keep going back to?  Which is the one that has not been a passing fad in your life?  If you’ve been drawn to fads all your life, what is the theme of those fads? In my case self-improvement has been the undercurrent of most of my interests.  Whether I’ve taken up meditation, read books on leadership, or spent time learning about health and nutrition.  The predominant theme of all these activities is self-improvement.  Consequently I’ve read hundreds of books that are directly related to the subject.
  3. Obvious strength:  Beyond being a skill or something that you can do, it is part of your essence as a person.  It is not something that you learned through practice.  Instead, it’s something you can do innately.  For example, people who know me well, like my husband of eight years and some of my bosses, have mentioned that I’m great at persuading people about things I believe in.  I did not learn how to do this – and no one taught me this. It’s something I do – and I don’t know why.  If you’re having trouble identifying this, ask people who know you well.  Ask colleagues, bosses, relatives or friends.

Where your distinguishing skill (career advice), predominant interest (self-improvement) and obvious strength (persuasion) intersect is your unique reason for being.

When I took time to complete this exercise, I discovered that my reason for being is:

To inspire and empower people around the world to create, follow and succeed on their path and consequently become better citizens of planet Earth.  To achieve this I will empower you with insight and know-how to claim control over your career and succeed on your own terms.

It’s your turn now.  I’d love to know why on earth were you put on Earth. 

10 tell tale signs of a meaning LESS job

According to Jewish Mysticism (a.k.a. Kabbalah) the number 9 represents truth*.  Since it’s 2009, I’ve taken the liberty to declare this my year of finding my own truth. 

Part of my commitment has been to discover what gives meaning to my life.  That includes finding meaningful work.  Those things that bring meaning to my life are what I call my truth.  And as I have my truth, I  believe that you do as well.  Some of you may already know what that is.  In case you don’t, read on to see how you can tell if your current job is devoid of meaning.

Here are the tell tale signs:

1.      You feel that it’s enough to do as little as possible in your job. 

2.      You start to crave external rewards, like bonuses, a pat on the back or a ‘well done’ from your boss.

3.      You play the blame game – and flick-off responsibility for your well-being at work to your boss or employer.

4.      You are stuck focusing on ‘what happened?’ rather than ‘what can I do?’ whenever a challenge comes your way.

5.      Little annoyances feel like big obstacles.

6.      It seems that most of your friends’ jobs are better than yours.

7.      You feel jealous – instead of happy – for other people’s achievements.

8.      You spend more time planning your next holiday than developing a five year plan for your career.

9.      Drudgery rather than excitement is your prevailing mood during the week.

10.  Paying bills is your only reason for being – and for getting out of bed every morning.

In my next post I’ll share with you an exercise I completed that brought me closer to finding my truth at work .

Stay tuned.

 

*Thank you Rabbi Shuey Rosemblum for sharing your wisdom.

Is your job meaning full or empty?

On my latest trip to South America I met a remarkable woman who I’ll call Maria.

Maria took care of my grandfather for many years until the second that life left him a week ago at age 96.*  As thankful as I am for her unconditional support and care for grandpa Pipo during his last years, that’s not the reason why I found her to be a special person.

Here’s why. 

After the funeral, Maria and I became quite close and she opened up to me.  During one of our last conversations she confessed that she had a dilemma and asked me for some advice.  She was in the middle of deciding whether to accept what most of her colleagues would consider an attractive job offer.   My grandfather’s second wife offered Maria the opportunity to stay working in her household and keep her company for an indefinite period of time.  In her new role she would not be required to take care of sick or elderly people.  In essence, Maria was offered a cruisy job for a very competitive pay.  Even so, Maria was conflicted because she happens to take pride and find meaning in her nursing role.  Keeping a healthy person company – although is easy in comparison  – does not give Maria the fulfillment that she finds in knowing that thanks to her, an elderly person has a better quality of life during their last years on Earth.

Maria’s dilemma reminded me of a situation I encountered some years ago while I was attending a sales conference as a medical sales representative.  During an afternoon break I overheard one of the more senior sales reps say to a group of rookies that they should give their new job at least six months, because after they got the hang of things, they wouldn’t have to do much – and still get paid well.  That conversation has stayed with me over the years because I’m still trying to figure out how someone can stay at a job where they get paid to do ‘not much’.  In this situation one might think that employees are short-changing their employer.   In my mind, the only one getting short-changed is the employee who is wasting their lifetime doing ‘not much.’

New York Times best-selling author and ultra-vagabond Tim Ferriss may not agree with me.  He might argue that making money without having to work is the ideal scenario because it means that there’s time to do other things in life – like dance Tango.  That’s fine by me if a vagabond existence brings meaning to someone’s life.  If it doesn’t, then a cruisy job comes only at the expense of the employee – not the employer.

Like Maria, doing something that I find meaningful brings meaning to my life.  That is one of the reasons I go to work.  The question is what brings meaning to your life?  Is that what you’re spending your lifetime on?

 

*Thanks everyone for your kind words and support. Given that Grandpa Pipo passed painlessly at 96, I feel sad that he is gone, but happy that he had a full life and I’m hopeful that he is in a better place. Fingers crossed that I inherited his gene pool!