Category Archives: negociacion

‘So what?!’ (How to cope when you don’t get a job offer)

Lets face it, with the current state of affairs, the competition for good jobs has gone up more than a few notches.  Chances are there will be many more bright people out there looking for work.  To you that means that it’s possible that you’ll have to interview for several jobs before you land one.

But is getting rejected from a job the end of the world?  Being that throughout my work life I’ve been turned down from jobs (notice the plural) even after I’ve gone to several interviews, I personally don’t think so.

To begin with, nothing is the end of the world.

More than that, there’s opportunity in everything.  The key is knowing how to find it.

Here are a few of the things that have helped me say (and really mean) ‘So what?!’ whenever I’ve been rejected:

  1. Think silver lining:  Not getting a job offer might be a blessing in disguise because a better job might be waiting for you right around the corner.  I have the benefit of hindsight since that happened to me not so long ago.  After going to three interviews, including one with the company’s Managing Director, not only was I sure that I’d get an offer, but I really wanted this particular job.  It ticked all of my boxes, including that it was close to home and it paid 20% more than my current job.  I was very surprised when my recruiter called to say that someone more experienced got the job.  As I was licking my wounds, within the hour of getting turned down, I got offered an interview for a job which more than exceeded my expectations.  It included a 30% higher pay and a national management role.  After three interviews I did get an offer that I accepted.  And the fact is that had I been offered (and most probably accepted) the first job, my recruiter would not have thought of me when this second job came along.
  2. Un-spoil yourself:  I get it, life lessons do not pay the bills.  But learning to make lemonade when life gives you lemons is one of those skills that will help you cope with one of the realities of life.  Unlike what we may have lived under our parents’ roof, in life we do not always get what we want.  Learning to make the most of what we do get will definitely give us an edge over those who waste precious time whining whenever they don’t get what they want.  It’s not about being complacent, it’s about being real and un-spoiled!
  3. Bounce back:  In a changing world resiliency is winning trait.  The more times you get a chance to practice bouncing back, the better you’ll get at it and the less shaken you’ll be next time that things don’t go how you expected.
  4. Keep the lessons:  Be honest with yourself and ask yourself why you did not get a job offer.  What could you do better next time?  Review your cover letter and resume.  Or could you have packaged yourself better during the interviews?  Use the experience as an opportunity to learn a thing or two.  Those lessons are your to keep for life.  Very few successful people got to where they are today without falling a few times.  The key is they got up and learned from the fall.
I’d LOVE to hear how you bounce back from a rejection. Or if you haven’t…

Find a recruiter for life

I did a short stint at a recruitment agency.  It was long enough to see the underbelly of the industry.  While what I saw was not pretty, I’m now thankful that since then I found a very professional recruiter to work with.  For the past 4 years I’ve stayed loyal to a recruiter who has landed me two great jobs in a row.  In fact, they have all been bigger and better than my previous ones.  Okay, so I kissed a few frogs before I found my prince(ss) – but my search certainly paid off.  I can now say that there are some great professionals out there.

What does my prince(ss) have that all those frogs didn’t:

1. She shows respect for me:  On our first meeting, it was clear to me that she took time to get to know about my career path.  From her comments, I knew that she had gone through my resume with a fine-tooth comb.

2. She gets me:  At our first meeting she asked me well-thought questions about my career and life in general.  To close our meeting she did a great job at summarizing my checkered career path and pointed out aspects of my personality that were quite insightful. 

3. She keeps her word:  At our first meeting she proposed a series of next steps.  Shortly after, she followed through on each one of her commitments.

4. She shows integrity:  Although shortly after we started to work together, she asked me for a 30-day exclusivity, she never asked me to sign a contract.  She trusted my word.  In return, I felt compelled to trust hers.

5.  She keeps me in the loop:  Since day one, whenever she makes contact with a potential employer, almost immediately I receive a phone call to let me know how it went and what are the next steps.  When she’s not meeting with my potential employers, she also keeps me up to date about her search and potential opportunities that may be coming her way.

6. She involves me in the job search:  She encourages my feedback about the roles that she sends my way.  As she often reminds me, she wants to know if these opportunities are on track with my expectations.

7. She has my best interests in mind:  She isn’t manipulative and has never forced me to go to an interview I’m not 100% sure about.  The same has applied to every position I’ve accepted.  She gives me space and time to make up my own mind.

8. She’s well-networked and specialized:  Being that she’s worked in the healthcare industry in Australia for more than a decade, she’s known by the key players.  As an owner-operator of her boutique agency, she personally takes care of these relationships.

9.  She thinks laterally:  Time after time, she identifies opportunities that most recruiters would not think to connect with my career path.

10.  She’s supportive:  Using her back-ground in coaching, she’s able to help me resolve doubts I might have before an interview.  Usually she also gives me clues as to what the employer is looking for.  I’m well aware that she gets commission if I get the job, but to me it feels that she’s going the extra mile to make sure that I feel prepared at my interviews.

Maybe your prince is right around the corner.  When you find them, I suggest that you hold on to them.

Job hopping 101

Because I’m still reading through the hate mail that I received after posting Are You Getting the Itch to Switch (jobs) on brazencareerist’s blog: http://www.brazencareerist.com/2008/09/08/are-you-getting-the-itch-to-switch-jobs I thought it would be a good idea to set the record straight about my philosophy about job hopping.

Lets start by defining what it isn’t.

Job hopping is not a sport. It’s certainly not about running away from something. Neither is it a way to feel redeemed by getting back at your boss or the HR department. Make no mistake, if it’s not done strategically, job hopping might as well be called career suicide.

In order for job hopping to lead you to success in your career, you must be strategic and follow a few ground rules.

These are my top 10:

Rule #1: Be a career owner. Take charge and run your career like a business venture. Have a long-term plan. At the very least know what you want to achieve during the next 5 years. Map out how you’ll get there. That way when you switch, you’re not running away, you’re going towards something.

Rule # 2: Package yourself on your resume. Ditch the features. Focus on the benefits that your past experiences will bring to your future employer. Your potential future boss does not care about how many clients you cold-called. She wants to know that because you’re not afraid of cold-calling you have the potential of opening new accounts. Back up your claims with past accomplishments.

Rule #3: Package yourself during the interview. Okay, so I’ve had 4 jobs in the past 5 years and I owned and ran a business in between. To show my future bosses what that means to their bottom line, other than quite possibly that I will not be around for more than 18 months – I use the following illustration:

+ + + + + = $$$ for you

To do this, I pull out a piece of blank paper and a pen and draw this same picture as I talk about what I learned from each experience. I focus on the transferable skills that I bring to the table that will impact their bottom line. For example, when I mention that I’ve had my own business, I explain that I can work under minimal supervision and get things done. I do not leave it up to them to answer: “What’s in it for me?”

Rule #4: Partner with a recruiter. I’ve worked in recruitment so I know how nasty recruiters can get – especially when they’re desperate to fill a role (i.e. to get commission). But I have also found some very professional ones out there. In fact, much of my success in hopping around I owe to one particular recruiter who since day one got me. It was more than chemistry. She took time to read my resume and ask me insightful questions. Not only did I feel respected, I also felt that because she took time to understand me, that she would be able to place me well. Twice in a row she has placed me in jobs that have been bigger and better than my previous ones. I suggest that you take the time to look for a recruiter who you feel comfortable with and you can trust. When you do, keep them around. I had to kiss a few frogs before I found mine.

Rule # 5: Network. I don’t believe in being Machiavellian about relationships. It’s those people who I genuinely connect with who have helped me the most during my career. So there’s little point to go around collecting acquaintances. For your network to really support your success, it must be made up of people you like and respect. Your recruiter is one of them.

Rule #6: Prepare for the sales presentation. Make no mistake, you are selling yourself at an interview. For that very reason, I treat every interview in the same way that I treat a sales presentation to a client. The difference is that at an interview I’m the product and the salesperson. I make sure that I know my product (i.e. my resume) and also my presentation. These days there are no secret questions at an interview. You’ll find lists and lists of interview questions online. Here’s a list I found to be quite insightful since it gives advice to interviewers on how to get the best (and worst) out of candidates: www.bnet.com/2403-13056_23-52952.html

Rule #7: Ask for the job. Please do not get so close to the job and yet be so far away simply because you do not ask for it. I admit that it can feel awkward to say to the interviewer: “I like what I know about the company, and what I learned today about the role and the team. And I really want this job. What will it take for me to get it?” But being that I’ve sat on the other side of the table, I know that candidates who do not ask me for the job come across as people without a back-bone. As a future boss, I want the person who will do whatever it takes to get the job done – even if it means putting up with a few seconds of awkwardness.

Rule #8: Learn to negotiate your salary. In an earlier post I wrote about negotiating the empowered way (http://silvanaavinami.com/?p=28). The main thing to keep in mind when you’re negotiating your salary is that a negotiation is the beginning of your relationship with your future employer/boss, not the end. To set a positive tone, aim for an outcome that’s mutually beneficial. For the relationship to last, you must feel that you came out getting what you need. By the same token, do not expect your future boss to give you more if that will land them in the loosing position. Expect them to pay you in line with your contributions – not the smick life-style you want to lead. By focusing on the value that you’ll add to the company, quite possibly you’ll find that you’ll be able to afford all those toys that you want.

Rule #9: Exit in style. I covered this in an earlier post (http://silvanaavinami.com/?p=161). In short, aim to preserve the relationship that you worked so hard to build with your soon-to-be ex-employer. Very few people know you as well as they do. Like I have, some day you’ll find that they will be great allies as you sail across the big blue ocean of possibilities.

Rule #10: Become a learning machine. To successfully switch jobs, let alone careers and industries means that you’ll have to climb some steep learning curves. And tackling all the information that comes your way can at times feel like trying to survive an avalanche. The key is to find out very early on in your career what steps you go through to learn new information as well as under what conditions you learn best. Once you know this, you’re less likely to panic if by month 2 in a new job you still feel clueless. For example, I know that after month 3 things start to gel in my brain. After month 6 I’ll start to see the light. So I no longer panic. I simply make it a point to sleep 8 hours a night for the first ew months so that my brain survives the over-stimulation.

You become what you read

In line with an earlier post where I talk about taking responsibility for outcomes in your career and striving to give work the best version of you, I believe that one of the best (and easiest) ways to self-actualize is through reading top-shelf publications, including books and journals – both on-line and off.

Reading – of the good kind – is perhaps one of the best things that I’ve done for my career.  That is why it irks me every time that I see a girl on the train, wearing what look like excruciatingly painful high-heels* and too much make- up for day light, holding a New Idea magazine (I prefer to call it No Idea – it’s Australia’s #1 gossip mag).   To me that train ride is a missed opportunity for her to learn something of value and do something with her life.  While I believe that a little brain candy is necessary to keep sane in life, it should by no means be something that a. one spends much time on or b. any money on.  You read right. 

My personal rule of thumb for keeping sane and staying actualized is 90/10. That means that I spend most of my life time reading worthy material and only 10% reading mind-numbing stuff.  If you’d like to stick to the infamous Pareto Principle, by all means shoot for 80/20 – or risk turning into a personality-less consumerist. 

I think I can count on one hand the number of times that I’ve bought (with my own money) a beauty magazine.  (Okay, I admit that getting beauty and gossip magazines from doctors’ consulting rooms, was one of the perks of working as a medical sales representative)  However, I cannot keep track of the number of National Geographic, The Economist, Time, Business Week, Harvard Business Review, inc. and Entrepreneur that I’ve invested in. 

While I do believe that EVERY publication, whether top-shelf or not, has SOMETHING to offer, I don’t believe in looking too hard to find gold.  More so, statistics say (and don’t ask me how statisticians come up with this stuff) that you get an average of 10% from any book that you read.  So if you insist on reading crap, well, you do the math…

By far the book that has had the most positive impact on my career has been (drum roll please) The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey (http://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits.php). My intention is not to give you a summary here – my intention is to get you to get off your bum and read it if you haven’t.  I read it for the first time more than 10 years ago and some of the principles that Stephen writes about continue to guide me.  Sure, his writing can sound like a sermon at times – but for those of you looking to take your career seriously, this is the Bible. 

(I know that my dear friend James Adonis – a very successful twentysomething, would agree. Check out his new venture: www.teamleaders.com.au)

3 of Stephen’s habits that remain on the top of my mind are:

1. Be proactive.  In my world, this has meant quite literally: ‘get off your bum and go get things done for yourself – cause no-one will make things happen for you’.  Maybe that’s the reason why I get up at 5:10am every day to meditate for 20 minutes, then I read for 20 minutes and then I go to the gym for an hour.  All this is to make sure that I give my work the best version of my self.  That includes a focused mind, an actualized self and an oxygenated brain & body. 

2. Begin with the end on mind.  I remember that when I finished reading that chapter, I took out a pen and paper and wrote down what I’d like my life to look like when I looked back on my 100th birthday.  Doing that exercise sure fired me up.  That was when I realized that it was up to me to make out of my life what I wanted my life to be.   It became clear to me that if I did not know where I was going, then I’d be leaving myself for the taking of those who did know.

3. Put first things first.  I’ve taken this habit to a more practical level. The time management matrix that he offers for separating the urgent from the important is probably the best model that I’ve seen for getting things done at work. Ever since the days when I was working as a pastry chef, almost 10 years ago, I’ve been following a time-management ritual.  I plan my weeks on Thursday afternoon and my days the night before.  Every Thursday I jot down everything that I’d like to get done the following week; my to-do list.  Then I go through the list and for each item I ask myself: ‘is this urgent? or is this important? or both?’  Then I mark the urgent and important with a letter A, the important with a letter B and the urgent with a letter C. Every night of the week, to get closure on my day and to get psyched up for the next day, I go through my to-do list and re-prioritize it based on what I’ve accomplished so far.  By doing this I’m making sure that I’m focusing on what’s most important in my life – not in someone else’s.

What have you done for your mind lately?

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*For the record, I believe in wearing stilettos at work. But please, if you need to walk on hard city pavement for more than two blocks, do me a favor.  Get yourself a nice-looking shoe bag so that you can keep your high-heels in your purse.  Then change to them in the elevator – feet binding is so passé ladies!

Note: I do not and will not get any remuneration from any provider if my readers – you – buy or use any of their services…I’m just sharing the wealth cause I care about you!

“to ask or not to ask”

“To ask or not to ask” that is the question.  

It’s the one I ask myself whenever asking someone for something stands between me and what I want. 

I’ll show you what I mean.

Whether what I want is to know what perfume someone walking down the street is wearing, or to use a bathroom at a restaurant where I’m not a customer, or to get a discount on a quote from a supplier, or a better seat on the plane, or more time off from work, or even a higher salary, I’ve found that unless I ask, I will never know if I will in fact be able to get what I want.

The first time that I remember dealing with this dilemma was when I was 8 years old while going to tennis camp in Miami, Florida.  It was a stinking hot summer afternoon when John McEnroe, my tennis hero of the time, came to the country club where I was going to camp to have a hit on one of the courts.  As I write this post I can almost feel my excitement when I spotted him on a court that was a few meters from where I was standing while I waited for the afternoon practice to begin.  Very quickly, my excitement turned into an obsession to get his autograph.  To his misfortune I was quite a determined kid so I decided to stand by the side of the court to wait until he took a break from his practice so that I could ask him to sign a tennis ball.  But as I soon found out (and to my own misfortune), John McEnroe can be much more stubborn than any 8 year old could even dream of being.  And what happened next taught some very valuable lessons in asking for what I want. 

On my first attempt to get his autograph, not only did he mumble a ‘no’, he also proceeded to spit on the ground and ignore the ball and marker that I was extending in his direction.  Determined to get his signature, I stayed by the side of the court waiting for him to come back to his towel and water bottle.  As he walked towards me one more time, I decided to be more proactive and I threw the tennis ball that I wanted him to sign in his direction.   He did catch it, but instead of signing it, he looked at it and threw it on to the court, in the opposite direction of where I was standing. (so much for my tactics)  Because I still had a few more minutes before my coach would call me back to the court, I decided to wait for him to come back one more time.  This time, as he walked towards me, my heart was beating at a million beats an hour.  I looked at him in the eye and as I extended a new ball and a marker I said to him: “Mr. McEnroe would you please sign this ball for me?”  He didn’t even look at me as he grabbed the ball and the marker from my pudgy hand and mumbled: “well I guess I’ll have to.” And he proceeded to sign the ball and return it to me!!!  After I thanked him, I grabbed my signed ball back and ran back to the clubhouse to show-off my victory to the other kids.

By following what I learned from McEnroe on that hot summer day I’ve been able to get most things that I ask for.  This has included 6 weeks of leave from work – with one day’s notice, a 15% increase on a pay package, access to the busiest doctors on my territory while I was selling prescription drugs, permission to work from home, extensions on deadlines, exit rows on multiple flights even though I’m 1.60 tall and vegan meals at steak houses.

Here are my ground rules for asking and getting what I want:

  1. Know that the worse that can happen if you ask is that you’ll get rejected.  Most times that will be with a simple “no”.  And most times, hearing a “no” is small change in comparison to what you stand to win if you get a “yes”.
  2. Ask as if you’re sure that you’ll get what you want.  Before you ask, convince yourself that what you’re asking for is normal – not an outlandish request.  Play that poker face to the max.
  3. Ask the right person.  In the example above, McEnroe was the only person who could sign the ball for me.  But if he hadn’t done so on my third attempt, I could’ve approached my coach to find out if he knew McEnroe and maybe could pull some strings to get me an autograph.  In the universe of work, usually a manager or a supervisor will get you what a front line employee won’t.
  4. Ask nicely.  Even after McEnroe spit on the ground, ignored me and was plain ole’ McEnroe, I did not change my tone when asking.  I let him be the lesser person.  I just watched him throw his tantrum while I kept my eye on the ball (literally) and continued to be polite.
  5. Ask until you get it.  Getting what you want might take some persevering. Just as well, I’ve found that timing is everything. Sometimes it simply works to come back later, when the person who can give you what you want is not as busy or is in a better mood.  While working as a medical sales representative, after multiple attempts and many rejections, I found this to be true with most receptionists at doctors’ consulting rooms.  I called it the “glycemic index phenomenon”.  If I asked a receptionist for permission to see a doctor soon after they’d eaten a candy or a chocolate bar, it was likely that they were experiencing a sugar low and were in a bad mood.  Consequently regardless of how polite I asked to see the doctor, I got rejected.  I learned that the best time to ask them for something was right after they had their caffeine hit and were feeling high and energetic.  Following that logic, I proceeded to buy coffees for moody receptionists who insisted on denying me access to doctors (i.e. my potential customers).  To some this would come across as bribery, but in actual fact I was trying to regulate their body chemistry!       

3 life-changing questions

After many years of being controlled by my emotions and being reactive to situations and people, I’m slowly starting to see the light and learn ways of being more rational and responsive.  For the past few years, because I’ve made it a point to be more in tune with myself, I’m much better at handling my emotions and not allowing them to blindly rule my life.

Because I believe in sharing the wealth, below are the three questions that I most frequently ask myself whenever I start to feel that an emotion is bursting to express itself.  By having these 3 questions top of mind, when I start to feel an emotional outburst bubbling, I’m able to give myself time to think before reacting emotionally.  I’m not claiming to be reflective and rational 100% of the time. But the times that I’ve been able to think of more rational responses to situations I’m facing, I’ve found that my responses have been much more productive and constructive than the emotional reactions that I managed to stop from surfacing.

Life-changing question #1: “What am I not doing for myself that I’m expecting others to do for me?” (thanks Susan Jeffers, PhD, best-selling author of the book Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway) 

I ask myself this question whenever I feel that I’m getting angry at someone. Just after a few days of being mindful of my anger, I started to notice that I usually get angry at someone because of something that I’m not doing for myself, not because of something that someone else hasn’t done for me or has done to me.  Think about that next time that you feel like biting a colleague’s head off.  Is it really their fault that you feel that way?  Or is your feeling of anger your responsibility? What aren’t you doing for yourself? I’d love to know.

Life-changing question #2: “What am I telling myself?” (thanks Fiona Harrold, the queen bee of life coaching in the UK) 

I use this question whenever I’m feeling afraid or de-motivated to do something. I’ve found that it helps me stretch myself whenever I’m about to do something that’s outside of my comfort zone.  As soon as I put my neurotic, Woody Allen-sounding little voice on trial, I start to feel more energized and some times even ready to take on the world.  See for yourself. Tune into the little voice inside your head whenever you feel deflated or afraid to do something, like cold calling* prospects or giving a presentation at a meeting. What are you telling yourself about your abilities, the potential outcomes, the situation itself, and what others think of you? Try it and let me know. 

Life-changing question #3: “What’s the worse that can happen?”

This question helps me put things in perspective when I’ve a decision to make.  It’s a question I ask myself constantly throughout day as I navigate through the many decisions that I need to make. Because of it, I’ve become a much more decisive person.  The main idea behind it is to get me to see whether or not I can handle things if things go wrong because of a decision I’ve made.  This is how a typical daily chatter inside my head goes: Should I wear the white shirt or the green one?  (What’s the worse that can happen if I choose either one?) Should I park in this spot or the other one? (What’s the worse that can happen if I choose either one?)  Should I use this supplier or the other one? (What’s the worse that can happen if I use either one?) Should I call this client or wait until the afternoon? (What’s the worse that can happen if I call at either time?)

Take a moment to this about this.  Is anything the end of the world?  I truly believe that if you think hard enough, you’ll realize that you can handle most things – maybe even the end of the world.  What do you think?

*cold calling: making unsolicited sales calls to qualified prospects.

Negotiating the Em-Powered Way

If you’re in the game of taking control of your career and running it like a business, negotiating your pay package is the most important negotiation that you’ll go into during your working life.  And if you’re doing things right, this negotiation will take place several times during the span of your career.  For the record, I’ve negotiated my pay package 12 times and I’m sure there’s more to come.

With the years I’ve certainly gotten better at it.  In fact, in the last 5 years I’ve switched jobs three times and each time I negotiated salaries that were 30% higher than what I was getting paid in a previous role.  I’ll do the math for you – I basically gave myself a 30% pay raise every 14 months in a market where the yearly average is 4.5%.

Read on if you want to know what I bring to negotiation table.

The Golden Principle:  We win or no deal

In the business world a negotiation marks the beginning of a relationship – not the end.  For that reason the only sustainable outcome is a ‘we win’; that’s when you get what you need and the other party does too.  That means that a negotiation is not a dog-eat-dog affair, instead it’s the process through which two parties that want to work together reach mutually beneficial terms.

If you’re wondering what happened to getting what you want, which can be different to what you need, here’s something for you to think about.  Lets say that you throw a tantrum on the negotiation table and end up getting what you want – but that costs you the relationship, let alone any future business.  Is that what you really want?  Think about that.

Principle # 2: The 3 Fs – Be fair, fact-based and firm

One of my mantras in life is ‘ask and you shall receive’.  It guides me whether I want to know what perfume a stranger on the street is wearing, or when I want to get business from someone, or even when I want someone to help me.  I know that if I ask, I receive.

However, I also know that it’s crucial to ask nicely. And on the negotiation table that translates to being fair, fact-based and firm.

To be fair have an abundance mentality. Relax, there’s enough to go around for everyone.  Aim to work in collaboration with the other party, not against them.

To be fact-based do your home-work.  Know before the negotiation begins what you really and truly need.  Remember that you’re aiming for a ‘we-win’, not an ‘I loose-they win’ and not an ‘I win-they loose’.  As obvious as that may seem, I’ve often seen how, in the heat of the moment, people give up their needs and go for the ‘I loose-you win’ to avoid confrontation.  Doing so lacks vision because ask yourself, how sustainable is a relationship in which you feel that you’re loosing?  Eventually you’re going to want out. Right? And whatever you do, give yourself some wiggle room.  Start asking just above your must-have point. Otherwise you risk being offered below it.

To be firm, be fair and nice but hold your ground.  In short, do not be aggressive or greedy. Express your needs clearly and respectfully. Trust me, people tend to be more cooperative when you use a friendly yet grounded tone.

Principle #3: Be ready to walk away

You read right. 

Coming across as desperate is one of the surest ways for you to get the short end of the stick during a negotiation.  Do not believe, even for one second, that the job that you’re being offered is the only one available in the universe of work.  Besides, if you in fact get your ‘dream’ job with loosing terms, how sustainable will that be?  With that in mind, once you know what you must-have, hold your ground. If you don’t get it, walk away.  I can’t guarantee that this will happen to you, but it has happened to me several times now that I’ve turned down what was meant to be a ‘final’ offer and the other party has come back to offer me what I need.  Because actions speak louder than words, by walking away, you’re making it loud and clear that if a future employer really wants you on their team, they need to reconsider their offer.

Principle #4: Deliver on your promises

Because your reputation is also on the table during a negotiation, make a commitment with yourself to deliver on your promises.  I am not saying that you should shy away from over-stretching your abilities, all I’m saying is if you do over-sell yourself, make the commitment to deliver what you promised, no matter what. Make no mistake, when you say that you’re going to do something and you do it, the person who benefits the most is you because it increases your confidence in your ability to make things happen. And that’s priceless..

Principle #5 – Keep the lessons

Becoming the negotiator that you want to become takes practice.  Quite possibly, there will be times when you feel that you could’ve asked for more (you know that when your offer gets accepted too quickly – ouch!).  Don’t dwell on your mistakes or losses. Instead focus on the things that you did right on the table.  Keep these in your box of tricks.

I say live, learn and grow!

Your turn now.  Do you have any tricks to share? What about happy stories? Any horror stories?